Llew's Reviews

Archive for February, 2005

Book #12 I, Fatty by Jerry Stahl

Thursday, February 24th, 2005 by Miss Laura

“The Old Country treated me like a king – even more than on my first visit. Girls in Paris kept putting their pantaloons in my soup. I don’t know if that’s a tradition or if they were low on dinner rolls.” – I, Fatty

This book has the most marvelous set up I have ever read. In the Introduction it explains how “Fatty” Arbuckle, a famous silent movie actor, was an addict of heroin ever since it was prescribed by a bad doctor after a botched surgery. After he was falsely accused of murder and rape, he lost everything except for his Japanese manservant who stayed with him more out of having no place to go as no one would hire someone linked to Arbuckle rather than out of loyalty. The servant had always adminstered Arbucle’s heroin doses so after he could no longer afford to pay him the servant extract salary in another manner. He would refuse to give Arbuckle his heroin until he told part of his story. The wiley man continued this until he had all of Arbuckle’s story.

The only problem is that I don’t if this is true or not. The front of the book says “a novel” but every review I’ve read treats it as the true story. Fiction or not this book was fantastically well written. In the end it’s exactly like my dating history – incredibly humorous and at the same time heartbreakingly pathetic.

Book #11 The Decay Of The Angel By Yukio Mishima

Wednesday, February 23rd, 2005 by Miss Laura

The Decay Of The Angel has left me speechless. Or rather spluttering. I can’t even think of how to describe how brilliant it was, but it was a more perfect capstone to the series than I could ever imagine. Up until this book (and even through the first half of it), I thought the series was good but nothing as remarkable as others had said. However this book has to be one of the best I’ve ever read, but it wouldn’t stand as such without the rest of the books as a background. Absolutely enthralling.

Book #10 The Temple Of Dawn by Yukio Mishima

Thursday, February 17th, 2005 by Miss Laura

It has taken me hours to get this post due to Blogger having problems. Obviously, they knew this book contained HOT GIRL ON GIRL action and bookstore masturbation. Yes, you heard me on the latter. At first I laughed, but on the inside oh how I was crying.

The worst thing about this book is reading it in public. Everyone sees the front of the cover and starts telling me about their Japanese tatoos. Even my DOCTOR joined in on the fun by describing his son’s tattoo which he had done on his lower back so only those he showed it to could see it. Only it’s just a wee bit too high so EVERYONE sees it, and don’t mind me and these hives I’ve had for a year, Doc, because I JUST love hearing about your boys scarification stories.

The first half of this book is pretty dry as it’s all about reincarnation and the different facets of it. However, the second half perks the whole book up with the obsessive thoughts of the narrator. It’s just that classic age old story of falling for a Thai princess who is really the second reincarnation of their childhood best friend… With some lesbian and bookstore masturbation thrown in, that is.

A real heartwarmer to be sure.

Book #9 Runaway Horses by Yukio Mishima

Monday, February 14th, 2005 by Miss Laura

How novel: a novel within a novel! The concept reminded me of Blind Assassin. Margaret Atwood could TOTALLY be the new Yukio Mishima. I mean if you just overlook the fact that he wasn’t a lesbian, that his story is political instead of shady sci-fi, and that there’s no hot girls on the cover of his books. Otherwise the two are COMPLETELY twins.

The novel within the novel of Runaway Horses is actually more of a very long pamphlet. A very long boring pamphlet that inspires the young man in the book (who is the reincarnated form of the main character of the first volume of the series) to gather a group of his compatriots together with the goal of killing the most evil men of their society and government off. The plan is thwarted when the leader’s father rats him out. Those Japanese patriarchs – always harshing everyone else’s mellow.

Honda, the best friend of the first book’s main character, quits his job as a judge and becomes a lawyer in order to defend the youth. Becoming a lawyer for someone – now that’s devotion! He ends up getting the youth off only for him to murder someone and then commit suicide. Oh the drama!

Stay tuned for next book when the youth is reincarnated into a princess!

Book #8 Spring Snow by Yukio Mishima

Thursday, February 3rd, 2005 by Miss Laura

January was my month of popular mainstream books which I would be able to handsell to customers and February is my quiet personal desire to read The Sea of Fertility tetralogy. The first two are the longest, but the second two are much more reasonable in length for this little project so hopefully I will be able to get them all read this month.

All I have to say about the first book is that it sure would have been helpful if all the boys of my failed romantic encounters would have caught a fever and died as soon as it was over. What an easy clean up and none of that awkward “let’s try to be friends now” transition!

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